Fantastic news for any masochists who live day to day on the edge where nostalgia for tokens of their childhoods get perverted by the forces of capitalism: Peanuts is getting into bed with the conservative book publisher Regnery in a five-year licensing deal to release books about American history, government and civics under the country’s Little Patriot Press imprint.
Regnery has actually been in the childrens’ book market for some time with Regnery Kids, the imprint responsible for such atrocities as Callista Gingrich’s yiffing fantasy series of illustrated tales about Ellis the Elephant and his adventures in teaching pinko commies why America is the greatest, bestest country that has ever been. You probably didn’t read it because you are a terrible American who would rather suffer under the crushing bootheel of socialism while you fellate Fidel Castro’s limp, dessicated Cuban “cigar” (penis). Little Patriot has its own series of kids’ books that seem to feature anthropomorphized mice teaching kids about the White House, Congress, and presidential pets. We’re sorry we didn’t hear about this before we bought our nephews those Batman and Jake and the Neverland Pirates toys for Hanukkah.
Parent company Regnery also publishes books by such leading intellectual lights as Michelle Malkin, David Horowitz, Ann Coulter, and of course Moon President Newt Gingrich. Since Charles Schulz was of the stolid, rock-ribbed, midwestern Republican species that has been going extinct in the GOP for a couple of decades now, we’re wondering how he would feel about his creation making sweet animated love to a company that fills its coffers with dollars grifted from modern-day wingnut rubes on whom Linus’ speech would have been lost.
We know how we feel about it: good grief!
Still we look forward to reading It’s the Great Filibuster, Charlie Brown, wherein the prematurely balding and unfortunate character learns all about how the Senate Republicans have used parliamentary chicanery to hold the line against the encroaching socialism of the Red Baron…er, Barack Obama. Should be fun for the whole patriotic family.